‘I don’t know where I’m at’: Cops say man on meth called 911 to report his own drunk driving [Audio]

Employees of a Florida sheriff’s department has some fun recently at the expense of a suspected drunk driver who called 911 for advice.

According to CBS News, Michael Lester contacted dispatchers on New Year’s Eve to make a report Polk County authorities have since released on social media.

“Allow us to introduce Michael Lester of Winter Haven,” the agency wrote. “On New Year’s Eve, Michael decided to call in a drunk driver. Himself. If you need to take a second to re-read that sentence, to let it sink in, we’ll wait.”

Michael Lester turns himself in for DUI

Driving while under the influence of alcohol or drugs is a serious crime. Innocent people are too often injured or killed from impaired drivers. DUI is not a laughing matter. However…in this particular incident, nobody was hurt, so we couldn't help but LOTO (that means we Laughed Our Tasers Off).You’ve heard Sheriff Judd on the radio telling his #CrazyCriminal Stories – we figured, for those of you who don’t have a radio, all two of you, why not share those stories here for your reading pleasure?Allow us to introduce Michael Lester of Winter Haven. On New Year's Eve, Michael decided to call in a drunk driver. Himself. If you need to take a second to re-read that sentence, to let it sink in, we'll wait.Good? Alright, let us proceed. So Michael called 911, and told the dispatcher that he was driving drunk, and needed to be pulled over. The dispatcher, who did a fantastic job by the way, continually tried to get Michael to pull over, kept him talking, and directed a deputy to Michael's location. Fortunately, Michael was stopped before anyone got hurt. Michael first told the deputy he had only two beers (standard drunk answer). Then he changed it to three or four (slightly more accurate). He also mentioned that he had only slept four hours in the past four days. Oh, and he also said that he had swallowed meth earlier, instead of smoking it. The attached audio is Michael's call to 911 (edited for time), and it's quite entertaining. Please folks, let this be a lesson to you that DUI is bad-bad-bad, because unfortunately, Michael is having a hard time learning this lesson. He has a criminal history which includes a previous DUI, as well as aggravated battery, drug possession, disorderly conduct, resisting, and hit & run. The Polk County Sheriff's Office had thirty DUI arrests in the month of December. Special thanks to Michael Lester, for throwing himself under the bus for #30 (we love round numbers). At least Michael wasn't involved in a crash, and lived to see another day (and maybe he'll see this Facebook post too. Hi, Michael!). By the way, he was also cited for driving on the wrong side of the road, improper use of the center lane, and no seat belt – 4 charges total (maybe he likes even numbers). #PCSO #DontDUI #Hello911ImHammered #SomebodyGetThisGuySomeBandAids#HeMethedUpBad #Best911CallWeveHeardInAWhile

Posted by Polk County Sheriff's Office on Friday, January 5, 2018

“I’m too drunk,” the motorist said in his call. “I don’t know where I’m at.”

He later indicated he was “driving on the wrong side of the road.”

The dispatcher engaged the caller in conversation, keeping him on the line and attempting to convince him to pull over. At one point the 911 operator reportedly asked Lester what he had been doing that evening.

“I don’t know,” he said, “driving around, trying to get pulled over, actually.”

He finally advised the dispatcher that he had stopped driving, though he acknowledged he was “parked in the middle of the road.”

Shortly thereafter, authorities arrived and he was arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence. Lester reportedly later admitted to drinking alcohol and ingesting methamphetamine prior to getting behind the wheel.

Before ending his 911 call, the suspect told the dispatcher to “have a nice night.”

The sheriff’s office posted the audio of his call and a lengthy Facebook post as a warning to other motorists about the dangers of driving impaired. Officers also admitted to sharing a laugh in light of the unusual call, though.

Several lighthearted hashtags followed the agency’s post, including #Best911CallWeveHeardInAWhile.

[Featured image: Michael Lester/Polk County Sheriff’s Office]